Wednesday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Just Say "No"!

What is the "Yes" Stress Trap?



Have you ever been, or are you now in, a stressful situation that you could have avoided if only you would have said "No" instead of "Yes"? For example: Did you take on an extra assignment and you can not realistically complete that assignment and your other obligations within the specified time? Did you agree to do something for someone and now you are struggling with your choice because if you do that particular thing, you know that it will be in opposition with your best interest? Or did you agree to do something for someone and you really do not want to do it and now you are wishing that you had said "No" instead of "Yes"?

If you answered "Yes" to any of these questions, you have fallen in the "Yes" stress trap and you need to get out of it as quickly as possible unless you run the risk of setting yourself up to take on more than you can handle. I know several people, including myself, who have fallen into the stress trap of saying "Yes" when they should have said "No" because they did not want to disappoint others.


How To Get Out of the "Yes" Trap A.S.A.P.




So now you are in a situation that you could have avoided if only you said "No" instead of "Yes" and you are looking for a way out. Do not fret; there is something that you can do to get out of your stressful situation immediately. This action has been around since the beginning of time and the action is " Change your mind". Although changing your mind may not be the most polite action to take, it is your right and one in which you should take as a last resort.

Whenever you take the "I changed my mind route" talk your decision over with the other invested parties and explain to them that you made an unhealthy choice and your choice is causing you to experience unbearable stress. This may disappoint the person who you did not want to disappoint in the first place but the results will be successful. You will have succeeded in removing yourself from the stressful situation.


Don't Be a People Pleaser !




In the future, it is important that you evaluate your situation before you take on responsibilities that you are unable to fulfill. Also if you have taken on a task which you are not able to complete, please make sure that you voice your decision early on so that you can give the other persons involved enough time to make other arrangements.

Finally, do not live your life as a "People Pleaser" especially if pleasing others causes you stress. You are not obligated to say "Yes" to everybody who asks you to do something just because you do not want to disappoint them. The sooner you start putting into practice telling people "No" the better your life will be. Remember, you were created to live your life with inner peace and joy and it is your job to take a stand and ensure that you do not put yourself in situations which are in conflict with your inner state of peace and joy.


More Useful Tips
Make Better Choices

Tuesday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: "Yes You Can!"

You Can Do Anything You Set Your Mind To Do!


I can't was the way that I use to respond every time some one would asked me to do something that I thought was too difficult for me to accomplish until I met a man who told me that can't is not a word. This same man told me that the word is "can not" and that I can do anything with the help of God. These few words changed my life because I went from thinking that I can not to believing that I can.



You Must Believe In Yourself and Your Abilities!

The way that positive thinking works in conjunction with Inner Peace is that if you believe that you have the power to accomplish your goals and that you are well equipped to meet the challenges of life, then you will be more likely to live your life with a sense of inner peace. A person who believes in their self views life as being full of opportunities.


The person who believes that they can not accomplish their goals has a different viewpoint regarding life. This person is more likely to see the world as full of obstacles and they also are likely to see themselves as being trapped and unable to achieve their goals. This person is less likely to experience inner peace because most of the time they feel frustrated and defeated.

What's Keeping You From Achieving Your Goals?




The thoughts that you entertain in your head are going to be the driving factor in how well you maintain your inner peace. If you believe that you can not accomplish your goals, then you will not but if you believe that you can achieve your goals then you will.

Once you understand that your thoughts are going to proceed your actions, then the next step to maintaining your inner peace will be removing hold me back words like "can't" from your vocabulary and replacing them with words like "I can" and "I am able."


More Useful Tips
Change Your Attitude

Sunday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Develop a Behavior Plan of Action

I Have a Very Stressful Job!



Maintaining my inner peace can be difficult at times due to the fact that I have a very stressful job. I work with high risk male youths and I face all types of negative behaviors daily that opposes my mental state of peace. It is not uncommon for me to get cursed at, physical threatened and verbally challenged when I give a directive.

The facility where I am employed has a high turn over rate with the youth, so the dynamics of the residents are constantly changing. The ages of the youth range from 13- 18. Based on the dynamics of the facility, what I have discovered about myself is when the group has an occupancy of older males 16+ I am better able to deal with their behaviors because they seem to be more disciplined.

On the other hand, when the facility is occupied with younger residents and residents who are mentally challenged, I have a more difficult time maintaining my inner peace. I am usually mentally stressed out.



Tips To Help You Maintain Your Inner Peace at Work

It is important to understand that when you are working on maintaining your inner peace that you realize and come to terms with the fact that you may not be able to control the behaviors of others but you have total control over how you respond to the behaviors of others.

I have decided to write a Behavior Plan for myself so that I can:
  1. Identify a Goal
  2. Identify the Behaviors that triggers me to respond in a negative manner
  3. Identify my emotional responses to these behaviors
  4. Understand why these particular behaviors causes me to respond in a negative manner
  5. Identify positive ways that I can respond when I am faced in a "trigger situation"


#1 What Do You Hope To Accomplish / What is Your Goal?

You must have a goal so that you can know what it is that you are working towards. Some people like to have their goals in their head, I would suggest that you write it down on paper. When you write your goals down on paper you can actually see what it is that you are working towards. When you can visualize your goal, it makes it "real".

My Goal is ...

I want to have peace and order at work



#2 What Are Your Triggers?


The type of behaviors that triggers me are:
There is one resident who I will call "D" the behaviors that he displays that off sets my state of inner peace are:
  • he requires constant monitoring
  • he is verbally abusive
  • he instigates the other residents and causes them to become upset
  • he constantly calls my name
  • he asks numerous questions
  • he demands my attention
The other resident who I will call "Z" also exhibits behaviors that challenges my inner peace. Those behaviors are:
  • he always has to have the last word
  • he challenges my directives
  • when I am talking to other residents or adults he interrupts my conversations without saying "excuse me"
  • he fabricates the truth when he does not get his way


#3 What Are Your Emotional Response to These Behaviors?



When I am faced with people:
  • who challenge my authority without due cause,
  • who are verbally abusive,
  • display attention seeking behaviors and
  • who are rude
I respond by:
  • Heart pounds more rapidly
  • My head starts to hurt
  • I lose my patience
  • My voice raise
  • My breathing becomes more rapid
  • Feeling annoyed

#4: Dig Deep to Understand Why These Behaviors Trigger This Response


What is it about attention seeking behaviors, rudeness, verbal abuse and people who challenge me that causes me to lose my mental state of inner peace?

The behaviors are harmless, in fact other people deal with these same behaviors and these behaviors do not cause them to lose their inner peace. We all have our own trigger points. You have to discover your triggers and then dig deep to understand why certain behaviors effects you in such a manner.

Well, the reason why the above behaviors challenge my inner peace is because...
When I am faced with:
  • Someone who continually challenges my authority without due cause I feel like I am being disrespected. I was raised that young people are suppose to respect their elders
  • Someone who curses or who is verbally abusive... Again I feel disrespected and I also feel like I am in a chaotic situation.
  • Someone who constantly demands my attention..I feel like they are drowning me, violating my personal space and leaving me no room to breath
  • Someone who fabricates the truth... I feel uncomfortable because I have to constantly make sure that I all of my actions are covered.
So in a nutshell, My inner peace is threatened because I feel disrespected, suffocated, uncomfortable and violated.

#5 What Steps Do You Need To Take In Order To Respond Positive When You Are In a Trigger Situation?



In the beginning of this exercise I ask you to identify your goal. My goal was to have peace and order at work. The peace and order that I desire to have a work is going to come as a result of how I respond to the behaviors that I perceive as "triggers". You see before I can structure the youth, they must first see me as a person who is calm and peaceful.

The way that I can respond to the above behaviors in a positive manner is by:
  1. Reinforce Positive Behaviors: A point sheet is a great way to reinforce the behaviors that you desire. The point sheet is a sheet which lists the behaviors that you desire to see improved through a rewards system. You can reward the youth with special privileges such as more phone time and unsupervised outings if they display appropriate behavior for a specific length of time. The point sheet will also help to discourage unwanted behaviors because if the residents do not display the behavior that is desired then they will not be rewarded privileges.
  2. Ignore Behaviors: I also learned that if you ignore attention seeking behaviors the residents will usually stop.
  3. Spend more time listening: I will devote at least 15 minutes a day to actually sit down with each resident and listen to their concerns. Listening helps the residents to feel like they are not being ignored. If the resident's feel like they are being heard then they will less likely act out.

Saturday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Take a Vacation

Take A Vacation



Are you feeling stressed, overwhelmed or anxious? If you are, then you may need to take a vacation to help you to reduce your stress. I work a very stressful job and I do not take vacations as much as I need to. The result is, I am stressed at work with a low tolerance level.


Go To The Beach



I love the ocean and my favorite vacation spot is to rent a beach house or a condo over looking the ocean for a weekend. The smell of the ocean and the roaring of the waves relaxes me. I love going to the ocean because it is really inexpensive!



Rent a Cabin


Another inexpensive vacation that you can take is renting a log cabin for a weekend. The wilderness is a great way to help you to maintain your inner peace because it's just you and nature. You can leave your smart phone and lap top behind and just spend time focusing on yourself, your family and your friends.


Take a Cruise


I have only been on one cruise but it was very relaxing. The food and entertainment was very wonderful. The great thing about taking a cruise is that you can take a long cruise or a cruise for a few days. It just depends on your destination.


Take a Train Ride




I am planning to take a train ride for the first time this year. I am going to go to South Carolina and take a tour of their historical towns. Riding on the train embodies my idea of peace because when I take my train ride, I am going to have my own cabin. There is not going to be anyone around to disturb my peace. I am going to use this time to sit back and enjoy the ride. I also plan to use this opportunity to relax, read and write.

Where is Your Favorite Vacation Destination?


My Ideal Vacation Destination is Africa

My ideal vacation spot is Africa. I hope to visit the continent one day and take a tour of the safari. I also want to see the pyramids of Egypt. I also would like to visit Israel and take a religious tour.


Vacations are a great way to help you to maintain your Inner Peace because they are so relaxing. When I take a vacation, I leave the care of the world behind me. Usually when I return from my vacation and I re-enter back into the "work world" I am refreshed and I have a fresh perspective on life. Where are some of your favorite vacation spots?

Friday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Increase Your Self-Esteem and Confidence

Do You Know Your Self-Worth?



Have you ever looked into the eyes of someone and noticed that the person's self-esteem or confidence was low or high? You can tell when a person's self pride is low because their eyes are dull and they seem to look away from you or towards the ground when they are speaking to you.

What makes a person have low self-esteem or confidence?

There are many reasons why a person may have a low regard for their self but two of the most common reasons are they feel like:
1. They do not matter at work or with their family and
2. No one listens to them


No One Listens to Me...




#1 Reason for Low Confidence: They do not matter at work or with their family

A person can develop a low sense of self worth easily if they feel like the work that they do does not matter. I have seen this happen a lot with women who self sacrifice their time to tend to the needs of their family and their family members does not take the time to show them that they are appreciated. Many mother's complain that they do not feel appreciated.

#2 Reason for Low Confidence: No one listens to them
How often do you see people at your place of work and you just walk by them with a simple wave of your hand? How often do you take the time to ask your co workers or your family members how they are doing? When was the last time that you asked some one close to you how was their day?


Is Your Self-Esteem and Self Confidence High or Low?


How can you increase the self-esteem or confidence in others?
You can increase the self-esteem and confidence in others by instilling value in them and by encouraging them.

Instill Value
If you want to improve a person's self regard, you should tell them all of the things that they do well and how important they are to you instead of telling them all of the things that they do not do well. The more that a person feels like they do matter, the more strengthen they will become. You can even ask them "Do you know how special you are to me?"

Encourage Them
You can increase the self-worth in others by setting aside at least 15 minutes a day and listening to them. You can ask your coworkers and your family members how you can assist them or what is the one thing they need you to help them with.

You Do Matter !



When you encourage a person through listening and you instill in a person self-value, you will increase their faith in them self. When a person believes that they do matter their eyes will beam when they talk to you and they will also hold their head up high and look at you in the eyes when they are speaking to you.

More Useful Tips

Challenge Your Beliefs

Thursday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Laugh More Often

Laughter Is Good For Your Heart


Laughter is one of the best ways possible to get your mind off of what is troubling you and on to something more positive. The great thing about laughter is when you are laughing you do not feel anxious, sad or angry. Laughing also reduces your stress level and it increases your energy level.

4 Health Benefits of Laughter
  • Laughing helps to relax your body: When you laugh you relieve your body of physical tension and stress . Laughing can leave your muscle relaxed for up to 45 minutes.
  • .Laughter helps your body to fight off diseases : Laughing improves your body's resistance to to diseases by decreasing stress hormones and increasing immune cells and infection fighting antibodies.
  • Laughter "feels good": Laughter is healthy for your body because when you laugh you release the "feel good" chemical known as endorphine. Endorphines promotes an over all sense of well-being and can even help your body to temporarily relieve pain.
  • Laughter is good for your heart : When you laugh, you cause your blood flow to increase. Increased blood flow helps to protect you against having a heart attack and other cardiovascular problems.

Laughter Reduces Stress







Laughter is one of the best stress management tools and it is free!
If you want to laugh then you should:
  1. Find humor in your life
  2. Watch a funny movie or television show
  3. Read the funny pages
  4. Surround yourself around people who have a healthy sense of humor
  5. Participate in fun activities
  6. Read jokes

Watching Comedy is a great Way to Induce Laughter






Comedy Show: Sanford and Son
My favorite comedy show is Sanford and Son. This is a classic! I can watch Sanford and Son episodes a thousand times and I am guaranteed to laugh until my stomach hurts each time.
What are some of your favorite comedy shows or comedians?


Telling Jokes is Another Way to Induce Laughter


Laugh, Laugh, Laugh
Knock Knock Jokes are a great way to Help You To Improve Your Sense of Humor
I love Knock, Knock jokes although some of them are sorta corny. If you have a healthy sense of humor, even the corny ones can get a laugh out of you. Here are 5 knock, knock jokes. Read these knock, knock jokes and let me know if you are laughing. You are welcome to share some of your favorite jokes as well. I really love to laugh.

#1
Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Tank.
Tank who?

#2
Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don't cry. It's only a joke.

#3
Knock, Knock
Who's there !
Eskimo !
Eskimo who ?
Eskimo questions. I'll tell you no lies !


#4
Knock, Knock
Who's there !
Dishes !
Dishes who ?
Dishes your friend Tonie, so open the door !

You're welcome!

#5

Knock Knock
Who's there ?
Quacker !
Quacker who ?
Quacker another bad joke and I'm leaving !



More Useful Tips
Protect Your Peace

Wednesday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Make Sure You Have Life Insurance


Be Responsible


Let's face it, you can not expect to live a peaceful life if you do not have your life insurance business in order. A part of living a peaceful life style is being responsible. When you are "Responsible" then you can rest within yourself because you know that you are not leaving any burdens on anyone else. Having Life Insurance is something that each and everyone needs. Most people do not like to talk about "death" and they get uneasy when the subject matter is presented to them but death is as much a reality as life.

I know so many people who have passed away and they left the responsibility of their burial to someone. When you have life insurance not only can you live your life with a sense of inner peace you can also pass on the peace to your loved ones because they will be able to bury you without worrying how they are going to be able to afford to bury you or how they are going to be able to afford to pay the bills that you left behind



What is Life Insurance?

My sister called me the other day and she said to me that our grandfather was looking for the phone number to his Life Insurance Company. It startled me because the first thing that I thought about was my grandfather was preparing for his death.
My grandfather, who is 87, has out lived many of his friends and family members but it was the recent passing of his dear friend that pushed him to get his affairs in order. When his friend passed away he did not have a life insurance policy and it took over a week before his family and friends were able to gather enough money to give him a decent burial.

  • Life Insurance is insurance that you will have enough money to have a decent burial and pay off of your debts.


Why Should You Have Life Insurance?

When I asked my grandfather why it was so important to have life insurance, he told me that he has always tried to live his life as a responsible person, he has always taken care of his family and he always paid his bills on time. He went on to say that you may not always know when it is your time to leave this world but you can be prepared so that you do not have to leave your family members with the burden of paying for your burial or struggling to pay your bills that you are leaving behind.

  • You should have life insurance so that your family will be prepared financially when they lose the support that was provided for them by you.
What Are The Two Major Types of Life Insurance Policies ?
There are two major types of life insurance policies and they are: 1) Term Life Insurance Policy and 2) Whole Life Insurance Policy
  • Term Life Insurance: When you purchase a term life insurance policy, you are agreeing to be covered for a period of 3 to 30 years. A term life insurance policy will pay the beneficiary only if the loss occurs during the time that the benefactor is insured. If you have agreed to pay for 3 or 30 years, when the insured period is over, the policy is terminated regardless of how much money you have contributed to your policy.
  • Whole Life Insurance: If you decide to purchase a whole life insurance policy then you will be covered as long as you pay your premiums, which can be your entire life time. Whole life insurance policies may be more expensive than term life insurance policies.


What Determines Your Life Insurance Quote?

In order to purchase an affordable life insurance policy for yourself or for your family members you are going to have to do your research and make sure that you are purchasing the right policy for your needs and that you are getting the right company to meet your needs.

6 Factors That Determine Your Life Insurance Quote
1. The type of life insurance policy that you want to purchase
2. The amount of coverage you want with your policy
3. The likelihood of having the insurance situation while the policy is enforced
4. The agent's commission
5. The overall insurance quote in your area
6. Your risk category



How Does Your Risk Factor Determine Your Life Insurance Quote?

The risk category that you fall into determines if you are going to get the most competitive life insurance quote from your life insurance company.

4 Types of Risk Categories
  • Preferred Risk Category: If you fall in the preferred risk category then you are a person who is healthy, does not drink, smoke or work on a hazardous job. Your insurance company does not considered you to be a risk factor and you will get more competitive quotes verses if you fall in one of the other groups.
  • Standard Risk Category: If you fall in the standard risk category that means that you are a person whose risk factor is average.
  • Substandard Risk Category: If you fit in the substandard risk category then the insurance company considers you to be a person who is above average risk but still insurable.
  • Uninsurable Risk Category: The insurance company may consider you to be a person who is uninsurable if at the time that your insurance policy is active, you have a very high risk of death.
If you should happen to fall in the uninsurable risk category it does not mean that you can not be insured it just means that you may have to do more research in order to find the insurance company that will insure you.

Tuesday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Make Home Work Fun



I work with high-risk boys as a youth counselor and assisting them with their math homework assignments can be very stressful at times, especially when they are not interested in learning math. I hear the boys state often that learning math for them is stressful because math is boring. When I am helping the boys with their math homework, the first thing that I do is figure out how to hold their attention by finding out what are the things that they enjoy most. I know that if I can get them to identify with the things that they enjoy most, then I can get them interested in learning. If I can get them interested in learning, then helping them with their math homework will not be so stressful. For instance, I know that the boys really enjoy football so I use football to show them how to understand the principles of math and how to make learning math fun.







Football Rules Made Simple

1. There is an offensive and defensive team
2. The objective of the football game is to score in the end zone and the team with the highest score at the end of the game wins
3. The middle of the football field is the 50-yard line. The numbers on the football field increase and decrease in increments of 10

How to Use Football to teach Math

1. Let the students name their teams based on their favorite college or NFL team
2. Draw a replica of a football field on the chalk board
3. Use colored chalk to write out the plays "math problems" and to show the movement of the football on the field

Math Problem #1
How to Teach Subtraction: 50-20=?

"Team A" has possession of the football on the 50-yard line. The Play: the Quarterback throws the football down the field. The Receiver runs down the field and catches the football at the 20- yard line. If "Team A " started at the 50-yard line and now has possession of the football at the 20-yard line how many yards did the Receiver on "Team A " gain on the play? Answer 30-yards.

Math Problem #2
How to Teach Addition 10 +30 =?

"Team B" is at the 10-yard line. The Play: The Quarterback is going to pass the football to the Running back and see how many yards he can gain on the play. The play is successful! The Running back on "Team B" gained 30-yards. If the play started at the 10 yard-line and the Running Back gained 30 yards, Where is the ball positioned at the start of the new play? Answer- 40 yard line.

I find that children who are challenged socially learn better when you can hold their attention. If you implement football or any other sport in the learning process, it helps make teaching math less stressful because it makes learning interesting. Football also allows you to involve the children in the learning process and that will help them to remember the mathematical concepts.

Sunday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Stop Complaining

Top Reasons Why People Complain



Readers, I have a couple of questions for you....

The first question is " Does complaining change things?
The second question is "If complaining does not change things then why do it?"

Now, I am not saying that if you are going through a difficult situation that you should not express yourself but a part of maintaining your Inner Peace is learning how to express yourself in a positive manner.

Top 3 Reasons Why People Complain
I have noticed that the top 3 reasons why most people complain (or variations of these reasons) are about:

#1 Money
At least once a day I hear somebody complaining about their money woes. The conversation usually starts out with them expressing their lack of money, their desire to have a pay raise or their kids needing money for extra curricular activities that they can not afford ...

#2 Relationships
I am guaranteed to hear someone complain about their relationship woes. This conversation may be about their marital issues, the issues that they are having with their coworkers or how someone disrespected them in their comings and goings....

#3 Health
The health complaints that I hear most often are usually from people who complain about their weight gain or their dis-ease caused by them not taking care of their bodies.


How Does Complaining Kill the Spirit






When you focus on the problem or everything that is going wrong in your life then you are denying yourself the gift of Inner Peace. Complaining destroys your Inner Peace because instead of being optimistic about your situation, what you are actually saying is that you are worried, you doubt that your situation will actually work out for the better and you have no sense of self-value.

  • You are Worried-Worrying kills your spirit because when you are worried ,you are anxious, nervous and not able to focus clearly. The whole point of operating in a state of Inner Peace is to maintain a calm and peaceful demeanor.
  • You Feel Hopeless- When you complain, you feel hopeless. Feeling hopeless kills your spirit because you feel helpless and unable to change your situation. People who complain when they feel hopeless kill their spirit of Inner Peace because they see complaining as their only option to releasing their frustrations. When you have mastered the steps of maintaining your Inner Peace you will recognize that you may not be able to change your situation but you can respond to your situation in a calm and peaceful manner.
  • No Sense of Self-Value-When you complain because you feel like "No one is hearing your frustrations", you will kill your spirit because you do not see yourself as having "Real Value". A person who does not realize their value, feels unimportant. You must have a feeling of self-worth in order to maintain your inner peace.



Positive Things You Can Do Instead Of Complaining






Instead of complaining about the Problem, you should focus on the Solution

#1 Money: It is easy to talk about your lack of money but a change is not going to just fall out of the sky. You have to plan to get more money and then work your plan.
#2: Relationship: If you are experiencing relationship problems then you have to do something about it. Complaining about it is not going to change a thing!
#3 Health Complaining about your health ills is not going to change the fact. Instead of focusing on your health issues resolve to change what you are doing to get yourself in the situation that you are in.

Remember: A Solution Focused outlook is going to be key to helping you to maintain your inner peace.

More Useful Tips
Be Happy With Yourself Everyday!

Saturday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Be Happy

My Philosophy and Happiness





I can remember vividly being younger and daydreaming about being successful. I use to lay on my back for hours at a time looking up at the sky and imagining that I was married, had two kids (a boy and a girl), owned a really big house and had tons of money. I hoped to have accomplished my vision by the time that I had turned twenty-five. My philosophy was if I was able to possess all of the material wealth that I desired, I would be able to experience happiness.



Well, needless to say, the age of twenty-five came and passed and most of the things that I had envisioned for myself did not come to fruition. Instead of being happy, I found myself constantly reflecting on what I had not accomplished in my life. The more that I thought about all of the material things that I did not possess, the sadder it seemed that I became. Things got to be so bad for me that I became depressed and I even questioned my very existence.



Stumbling on Happiness



I felt so hopeless during that period of my life, that I started going to church hoping to find the answer to “How to be Happy”. I can recall one particular sermon that changed my life forever. The sermon was entitled "If You Change Your Perspective, Then You Will Change Your Life!"


The pastor explained that the reason why you are happy or unhappy is based on what you are focusing on. If you focus on things that make you unhappy, then you will be unhappy. On the other hand, if you focus on things that make you happy, then you will be happy.

What Makes People Happy



The more the pastor preached about changing your perspective, the more I became aware that my source of unhappiness was based on the way that I was defining my success. I was equating being successful with material wealth. The reason why I was unhappy was because I did not possess all of the material wealth that I had desired so I believed that I was a failure in life.

The message “If You Change Your Perspective Then You Will Change Your Life” caused me to redefine my concept of success. Instead of focusing on “What I have”, I began to focus on “Who I am”. At that point, I made a list of some of my better qualities and I pointed out that “I am a nice person, I am a caring person, I am a person with good work ethics, I Am a person with good morals” etc.

What I discovered was, the more that I identified with the “Who I am” instead of the “What I have”, the happier I became. As a result of focusing on things that make me happy, today I am able to experience a new found wealth of happiness.

More Useful Tips
Be Happy With Yourself

Wednesday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Be The Best Person You Can Possibly Be

Be The Best Person That You Can Possibly Be



In order to be the best person that you can possibly be, you must be able to maintain a state of peace and joy within yourself. Let's face it, if you are living your life in a state of turmoil and discouragement then you are not operating at your highest capabilities nor are you experiencing your best possible life now. This posts discusses three basic but powerful steps that you can apply in your life now in order to achieve an inner state of peace and joy regardless of outside circumstances. The three steps are 1) Make a Decision 2) Let Go and 3) Be Positive




#1 Decide That You Are Going To Be Happy No Matter What





The first step in achieving inner peace and joy is to decide that regardless of outside circumstances, you are going to maintain inner peace and joy. When you make the decision not to be moved by outside circumstances, you are taking control over your mental state of being. Even when you are confronted with challenges, such as a change in a relationship, getting behind on your bills, transferring careers etc. you have to remain unmovable in your decision not to let your circumstance effect your inner peace and joy. The way that you are going to remain unmovable in turbulent times is by finding something positive to focus on and something to be thankful for. When you consistently express gratitude, it takes your mind off of what you do not want and places your focus on more of what you do want. The expression of gratitude will wipe away your despair and give you the peaceful state of mind that you will need in order to move forward and overcome your challenges.


#2 Let Go of All Of Your Negative Emotions





The second step in maintaining inner peace and joy is to choose to let go of all negative emotions that you have attached to people, places and things. Letting go is a major player in maintaining inner peace and joy. The following exercise will explain. The first thing I want you to do is to spend a couple of minutes focusing on something that you really enjoy. While you are focusing on what you enjoy pay close attention to your emotional response. Were you smiling? The second thing I want you to do is spend a couple of minutes focusing on something that you are not fond of. Again, notice your emotional response when you focus on what you are not fond of. Were you frowning? The point is, you will experience a negative or positive emotional response based on if your perception of a person or event is negative or positive. If you want to maintain inner peace and joy you must let go of all negative emotions and focus on things that bring you joy and give you peace.


#3 Live Your Life With a Positive Attitude




The third step in maintaining inner peace and joy is to choose to live your life with a positive attitude by focusing only on the highest and best in everything. Remember that you will have an emotional response based on your perception of your experiences as being positive or negative. When you stay focused on seeing the best and highest in all people you are inviting joy and peace in your life because you are only seeing the good. When you see only the good, you are going to smile. Along with having a positive attitude you are also going to choose to make right choices. The right choice for maintaining inner peace and joy is to choose to respond positively when confronted with adverse situations that occurs in your life verses reacting negatively. When you take time and hold back from reacting negatively to an adverse situation and spend time considering the best possible solution before you respond, you are taking control of maintaining your state of inner peace and joy.


It's Your Choice-Choose To Be Happy




Maintaining inner peace and joy is a choice and when you practice focusing only on the positive in life you are making a choice to take control over inner peace and joy in your life. I received an email today about a man who was blind and because of unfortunate events that had occurred in his life it was necessary for him to move into a retirement home. During orientation one of the facility nurses described to the man what his room looked like. The blind man listened patiently and when the nurse finished speaking, the man stated that he was going to love his room. The nurse could not comprehend how the blind man could love the room when he had not even entered his room. The blind man stated that he made a choice long before arriving to the facility that he was going to love the room regardless. Friends, in order to maintain your inner peace and joy, you have to be like the blind man and wake up every morning with the mindset that you are going to live your life to the fullest in peace and with joy, regardless of whatever is going on in the world around you. Remember inner peace and joy is a choice.

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Tuesday

Inner Peace and Joy Daily Tip: Forgive

Forgiveness and Your Personal Development



Forgiveness is a crucial component to your personal development because when you forgive, you let go of what you do not want in your life and you focus on what you do want. Some people choose not to forgive because of what they believe forgiveness does for the other person. A common statement is "This person hurt me and I will never forgive them for what they did to me." I want to stress in this article, that the recipient of your forgiveness is not as important as the healing effect that you will receive when you let go of your hurt and pain and forgive them of their wrong doings. Forgiveness creates a vacuum in your life for the good that you want.

The Law of Compensation and How it Works
The Law of Compensation states that you get what you give. The way that this law works in regards to forgiveness is every negative emotion and energy that you are holding inside towards someone else you are actually inviting to manifest into your own life. What I am saying is, rather you realize it or not, when you hold thoughts of hate, anger and resentment towards another person, place or situation those are the same emotions that you will experience in your life . For example, If I am giving off emotions of anger and resentment towards someone because of their wrong doings , then at the time of expression I am actually angry and resentful. As long as I express anger and resentment towards someone else, I will remain angry and resentful.

Is there Healing in Forgiveness?



In all honesty, I am not saying to any person who has been the recipient of harm that their situation should be ignored nor am I saying that they should not express any emotional response. What I am saying is that there is healing in forgiveness. The way that forgiveness heals is when you forgive a person, place or situation for all wrong doings what you are actually saying to your circumstance is that you do not want to live your life as a angry person, full of hate and resentment. When you release all of the negative emotions that you have attached to a person, place or situation and focus on forgiveness then you will be able to experience joy in its fullness.

Unconditional Love and Forgiveness

In order to experience joy in its fullness, you must release all negative emotions and replace them with positive emotions and with thoughts of love. When you practice unconditional love that is what you are inviting into your life. Understand, that you do not have to be in the same room with a person to practice unconditional love. You can give thoughts of forgiveness to a person as well as pray that they will be changed for the better.

Forgiveness and Prayer


Praying for forgiveness is not a one time event, forgiveness needs to be practiced everyday. The reason that forgiveness needs to be practiced every day is because every day there is a possibility that you are holding on to a negative thought that needs to be released. Some negative thoughts may be obvious to you such as when you make a negative comment after someone cuts in front of you in traffic and you hold on to that negative emotion far too long. In that case you may need to pray for the driver as well as yourself. Other situations may not be as obvious to you such as hurts and pain from your past. These are the emotions that you have buried inside. The less obvious hurts and pain requires prayer in order to be bought to surface so that you may be healed.

The Gift of Forgiveness


Remember that when you are practicing forgiveness you are releasing what you do not want in your life anymore and you are focusing on what you do want. The healing benefit of forgiveness is that it gets your mind off of the accused and back on the experience of joy and fullness of life that you were created to experience. Be mindful that you have control over whether or not you are going to experience inner joy and no person, place or situation can take your joy from you. You are in control over your state of mind because you understand that if you want to experience inner joy then you must give positive energy to others.

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